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A song with hidden parenting messages

July 18, 2017 By Abel Cheng

K started listening to music not long ago but most of the songs he recommended me I can’t appreciate.

The opposite is also true. He doesn’t appreciate the songs I like when I was in my teens. It’s so boring, he said.

Maybe it’s a sign of generation gap. Or something else. I don’t know. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Blog, Parenting

What pork ball noodle seller taught me about parenting

June 17, 2017 By Abel Cheng

pork noodle parenting
Photo Credit: Karen Newman Photography

It’s not an exaggeration if we say J and K grew up with it.

Everyone in the family loves his pork ball noodle. We have been patronizing this particular pork noodle stall for a long time.

So often that we have become friends with the friendly owner.

Whenever we order, without the need to show privilege card, we always end up with a bigger portion of noodles, not to mention extra pork balls.

Sometimes when it’s not packed with customers, the owner sits down with us and has a chat. He likes to joke with K especially. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Blog, Parenting

How to teach children contentment even if they suck at life when they grow up

May 7, 2017 By Abel Cheng

Making a wish
Photo credit: Jackie O

Here is one truth that I feel we should let our kids understand and practice it. This is important so that they will look at life as it is rather than seeing the world through colored glasses.

So that they know no matter what happens (even the bad ones), they are still okay.

I find this story simple and extremely easy to understand; and it brings out one of the most important truths about life that I am going to share with you.

The story is told by a Buddhist monk whom I have high respect for. Read carefully and find the meaning behind this excellent story so that you can pass on to your child.

Here’s how the story goes:

Five children were playing this Wishing Game. The first one was asked, “If you had a wish what would you want” and the child said, “If I had a wish I would want an ice cream.” She liked ice cream.

The second child who was a little bit older said, “If I had a wish I’d wish for an ice cream factory.” The first child thought that was really clever because if you had an ice cream factory you could get an ice cream whenever you wanted one. Not just one ice cream but hundreds of ice creams.

The third child was asked, “What’s your wish” and he said, “I’d like a billion dollars. Because with a billion dollars I can buy an ice cream factory, a cake factory, a fish and chip shop or whatever else I want, and I could do a lot more”. The first two kids thought, ‘wow! Aren’t we stupid? Why didn’t we have think of that?’ They thought that this young fellow who wished for a billion dollars was a genius.

But the next child when asked what he wished did even better than wanting a billion dollars, he said, “I wish I had three wishes, so that I could wish for an ice cream factory with my first wish, a billion dollars with my second wish, and with my third wish I could wish for another three wishes.” They thought, ‘wow! You can’t do better than that.’ Can you think of a wish that is even better than that – to have three wishes and the third wish is that you can wish for another three wishes?

But the last child did surpass that, he was the Buddha to be, and said, “I wish I had no wishes.”

Isn’t that interesting? Because when you have no more wishes it means that you are completely content. You’re free from all desires. You’re free from all that wanting. You’re free from all feeling of lack, the feeling that somewhere in your life, somewhere in your body, somewhere in your mind, something is missing.

Imagine what it would be like if you had no more wishes, completely happy with whatever comes along, completely happy with this present moment. You don’t wish for it to be anything else. You look at your husband and he’s absolutely perfect. You don’t wish him to change at all. You look at your wife and she’s so beautiful. You don’t wish her to be anything different, neither better nor worse.

No more wishing is going against the grain of modern society isn’t it? We want to have the freedom to have more wishes. We want the freedom to have more choices and more money to express our choices. We want more freedom to express our individuality.

Buddhism says the cleverest child is the child who wishes for no more wishes.

– Ajahn Brahm

 

For more parenting tips, check out “The Nonconformist’s Guide to Parenting”

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Filed Under: Blog, Parenting

Pewter Making at Royal Selangor Visitor Centre

March 28, 2017 By Abel Cheng

Royal Selangor Visitor Centre
World’s Largest Pewter Tankard

Royal Selangor is a household name in Malaysia (and the rest of the world for that matter) for its renown long history in pewter making.

The company which was founded in 1885, by founder Yong Koon, has a visitor center that is open to public. We wanted to visit the center for as long as we could remember. Finally, the timing was right and we made our way to Royal Selangor Visitor Centre (RSVC) during the recent March school holidays. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Blog, Fun Times

How I found time to exercise (And I achieved more than I thought)

January 24, 2017 By Abel Cheng

fitness and exercise
Photo Credit: Pablo TorresCosta

Ever since K started primary school, if I am not wrong, I stopped doing exercise.

Not that I don’t like exercise but due to change of routine, it had been conveniently dropped off the radar.

Before that I used to jog around the neighborhood. That was my morning ritual for many years until K went to school.

After that, I stopped running except for some occasional stretching, push-ups, crunches, pull-ups or fighting for monkey bars with other kids when I take K to playground.

Nothing serious as I took exercise lightly. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Blog, Health and Fitness

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