I let you in on a secret:
My wife and I never really got separated from J and K since they were born. Except our trip to Japan in 2010. Even that both of us were away together.
But this time is different.
My wife is assigned to a project in Brisbane and she is there for 10 days. Leaving me alone handling the household.
Today is the last day my wife is there.
While she’s away, I get a taste of how being a single parent feels like.
There’s not much difference as far as I’m concerned. Since I am a stay-at-home dad, the only “extra” chores I need to do is to take care of the kids in the evening and on weekend. When my wife is at home, those are the periods when my wife takes over the driver’s seat.
Other than that, everything is just like normal. It feels good to know that you are still in charge and capable of coping even though you are alone without your spouse.
Now let’s talk about how J and K fare.
I thought J and K would not be able to face the “challenge” of being without their mom for 1.5 weeks.
Contrary to what I thought, they are doing fine so far.
No missing mom syndrome.
No abnormal behavior.
(Of course with the help of technology, we Skype with mommy almost every night.)
I am proud and happy to find that they are coping very well even though the mother is far away in Down Under.
Being parents, it’s typical that we want our children to MISS us and tell us how they CAN’T carry out their lives as usual while we are away.
But I have to say this:
This is only good for ego-boosting and it makes us feel we are a very important part of our child’s life.
Personally, I feel that is not important. And honestly, I don’t fancy that.
I’d prefer J and K to be like what they are now – facing the absence of parent (or parents) with calm and going about their lives like normal – to being whimpy and grinning how much they miss their mom or dad.
In the end, I want them to be able to step up to any challenge they face – with or without parents.
You’re right. I don’t sound like other parents.
To the extent that I’m weird.
It’s not that I purposely want to be different from the herd so that I can look cool. But IMHO, unfortunately that’s the way things should be.
And tell you what, I don’t give a hoot about what others think of me.
That’s why I don’t call my new book “The Nonconformist’s Guide to Parenting” for no reason.
In it, you’ll see even more against the grain parenting tips.
If you are looking for a “me-too” or “same-old” parenting book, then the book is NOT for you.
But if what I say resonates with you, then I encourage you to check it out.
To get notified when the book is ready and enjoy an early bird discount, hop on to the notification list at:
I’m sorry to keep you waiting. There are still unfinished tasks to do. But the book will be ready soon.