Home  Blog by Parents Parents and Parenting Blog Journals, thoughts, opinions, experiences of parents from around the world.
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What's your parenting style? |
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Parenting
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Written by Administrator
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Wednesday, 04 April 2007 |
Do you know your parenting style? What kind of parent are you?
Heck, you don’t know? Don't worry, it's easy to find out by taking the following parenting style quizzes:
1) Parenting Style Quiz - About.com
2) Do You Know Your Parenting Style? - ChildrenToday.com
Basically there are three types of parenting style. But we think that you should not get too hung up with the results from the quiz as what matters most is how you help your child to be the best based on his capabilities. Not so much which style you belong to.
So have fun finding out your parenting style! |
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A child's weaknesses and strengths |
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Parenting
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Written by Abel Cheng
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Tuesday, 03 April 2007 |
When you know that your child is not good at doing certain things (sometimes it's just so darn obvious), would you tell him that he's just not born with the skill? Or you give him a praise to motivate him instead.
Will praises help your kid to become a smarter child? A research shows that it's not necessarily true. Telling your child is smart will sometimes backfire.
What I will do is to tell him the truth. Everyone of us is born with certain talents and strengths. We can do certain things better and more easily than others. That's a fact. I will ask my child to focus on his strengths and not weaknesses. Because you can't improve weaknesses and the most you can get is an improved "weakness." Still not a strength yet.
You know what, when your child is using his talents, he feels the joy and satisfaction. That's what we want for our kids, right? That's what it counts - to see our kids happy.
Unfortunately, the education systems in schools do not reflect this. The teachers want our children to be perfect in all areas. Is it possible? Yes, it is but you may need to trade off your child's happiness, to some extent. That explains why I feel "sad and upset" when people focus so much on academic excellence. If this is true, all the professors in the universities are the most successful in the world. Which I think you know it's not true. On the other hand, the highly successful people aren't necessarily get the best grades at school.
So focus on your child's talents and strengths and please don't expect him to be perfect. Hey, nobody is perfect including you. So why would you want your child to be one anyway? |
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Should children be tested at primary school? |
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Parenting
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Written by Administrator
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Monday, 02 April 2007 |
An interesting survey for New Zealand parents on "Should children be tested at primary school?" Look at the responses from parents, at a glance, they are all in favor of the tests.
We think that the idea of conducting tests to measure against own's past results is better than against your peers'. This creates nothing but unnecessary pressure on the children. What do you think? Do you think we should put pressure on our kids from such a young age? |
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Marriage and Relationship
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Written by Abel Cheng
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Monday, 02 April 2007 |
"Let's take a look at the pendants." My wife said to me when we were passing by a diamond retailer shop while we were enjoying our time together without the kids at a shopping mall.
As you might have guessed, I was reluctantly dragged into the shop. It's not that I don't like diamonds. It's the price that is killing me. And I always think diamonds are not a good investment vehicle, might as well I buy something else (like gold) if I have the spare cash. Diamonds are definitely the last on my list.
Back to the story. My wife and I were given a crash course on diamonds by the salesperson at the shop. I quickly transformed from a diamond idiot to someone who knows a little bit about diamonds. Hey, at least I know the four C's of diamonds.
 It looked like I was more interested to get to know diamond than my wife. As we sailed through the training, we were unknowingly presented with top of the range diamonds available. Of course, they looked stunning and amazingly attractive, even to me!
We were cautious not to fall into the trap. I must say that my wife knew what she wanted. She was strong enough not to be swayed away.
Even though the shop did not have the design my wife loved, I think it's fair enough for my wife to have a gift of diamond. This is for her support she has been providing me, not to mention love and care, and two children that she gave birth to.
Next time, I will have no problems stopping by at any diamond shops until my wife gets what she wants... if the price is not too scary. |
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Home Organization and Safety
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Written by Abel Cheng
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Wednesday, 28 March 2007 |
I couldn't help it but feel worried when I read about break-in incidents that not only caused the loss of valuables but more. It has become like a "trend" now the robbers really make use of the break-ins to the fullest. They now rape women like there's no tomorrow. They are not satisfied with just the loot they get, they want more. Occasionally, they rape because what they get is not "enough." Therefore, to compensate for the not-so-much harvest, they take women and rape.
This is really getting out of hand. What if the victim was your wife or your daughter? Even though you're a man, there's nothing you could do when you're at their gun/knife point but to watch the untoward incident happening right in front of your eyes. What a sad thing to happen!
My wife told me that we should keep a little bit more cash at home in case these robbers appear. I would have laughed at the idea but it makes sense though. Nowadays, it's high time to live smart and learn more about urban survival. |
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Teaching kids about security and survival |
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Parenting
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Written by Chris Young
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Monday, 26 March 2007 |
I think the most overlooked aspect of parenting is teaching our kids about self defence and security. What they must do to avoid untoward incidents like kidnapping, accidents on the road and at home. I believe this has to be instilled in the kid's mind for at least a few times before they get it.
About 2,100 children are reported missing each day, according to the U.S. Department of Justice.
John Peek, of Deerfield Beach, is offering a free class on child-safety and abduction awareness next Saturday for parents and children in Broward and Palm Beach counties. Peek is the owner and head instructor of ATA Black Belt Academy, a Deerfield Beach Tae Kwondo studio.
Here are some of Peek's top tips:
Saying NO: Peek says the way a child says it is key. A child should step back with their hands waving in the air and shout "no" in ways that call attention from others nearby.
Don't touch me: Children need to be taught it is not appropriate for any stranger to touch them in the "bathing suit" areas of their body.
I don't know you: It's OK for kids to call attention to themselves whenever an unknown adult approaches them. Yelling "stranger danger" will let other adults in the area know something is wrong.
Home safety: Children need to know predators will sometimes pretend to be a friend of a parent or a person bringing news about a parent being injured or hospitalized, so strangers should never be allowed to enter a home. And they need to know it's not safe to provide strangers any information over the phone.
Self defense: Peek will also give hands-on demonstrations that teach a child basic ways to break free from a stranger, including how to pull back on a person's thumb, because that is the weakest part of the hand.
These are handy tips that are not only good for kids but adults as well. Once in a while, it's good to remind ourselves and our kids about this.
Source: Essential tips on how to keep your kids safe from strangers |
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Breastfeeding is good but what if you can't |
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Parenting
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Written by Abel Cheng
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Friday, 23 March 2007 |
For mothers who are able to breastfeed but still hesitating whether to breastfeed your infant, you may want to take a look at this. A mother is diagnosed with breast cancer and she is not able to breastfeed her baby. She got so upset after discovering the benefits of breast milk but she can't give it to her baby.
If you are still contemplating about breast milk or formula, just imagine that you're so much luckier than this mother because you still have a choice to breastfeed.
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Marriage and Relationship
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Written by Administrator
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Wednesday, 21 March 2007 |
If you're going to be a parent but you are not married yet, what will you do? To marry or not to? I believe it depends on the individuals. But based on what I observe, men usually don't see the need to get married, just like this man said, "I don't really see the point." But it's a totally different point of view for women. After all, men and women are from different planets...
What about you? |
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More about my son learning to walk |
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Parenting
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Written by Chris Young
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Tuesday, 20 March 2007 |
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My one-year old toddler now walks more than crawl. About last two weeks, he only walked 2-3 steps and back to crawling again. But this time, he walks more. Even then, when he walks, he tends to wobble. It's kinda cute to watch him walk. It's like a gigantic task for him. Even though we sometimes can't help but laugh at him, he can't be bothered but continue walking. |
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A different perpective into your child's thinking |
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Parenting
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Written by Abel Cheng
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Monday, 19 March 2007 |
My wife has recently started playing a game with my daughter before bed time. I am just an observer and I am amazed by the sheer power of the game despite its simplicity.
Here's how to play the game:
Ask your child, "What's your happiest moment of today?" And followed by, "What's your saddest moment of today?"
Yes, that simple. Then just keep your mouth shut and listen without making comments. Just acknowledge what you hear. And my daughter likes the game so much, she created her own questions like "Mommy, what about what I am most upset with?"
What do you think we did? Of course, let her talk and complain about what she wanted to say. Sometimes, I just giggled silently to the answers she gave.
But that's not all. The best part is I am amazed to find out how my daughter thinks. Once, I was the "object" for making her angry one day. "Daddy talked to me very loudly when she asked me to tidy up the toys." she said.
To me, of course, I didn't agree that I was rough when I spoke to her because as far as I was concerned, I did talk to her nicely. But this was not what she thought. By listening to her sharing her inner thoughts, I discover how she thinks and how she weighs certain things more than others. This is a good way to learn what makes her tick and how I can be more careful when dealing with her.
I must thank my wife for initiating this bedtime game. It's an eye-opener indeed. |
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Parenting
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Written by Ruth Liew
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Friday, 16 March 2007 |
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The results on the survey whether spanking is effective are not really surprising. I do not agree with spanking and would like to advise parents to try other more positive methods.
Most parents who use spanking do find it effective because it works for them. Children do stop their misbehaviour when parents spank them or threaten to spank them. But is this the only to discipline children? I truly hope not. If only parents will try a little harder, there will be other ways to discipline children. Children who are spanked learn that when they are bigger and stronger, they can also use physical means to solve their problems. This is something I am sure parents do not want their children to learn.
The cost of using spanking is too high for parents with young children. There will be negative effects that will become more apparent when children grow older. Whether spanking is effective or not, parents should consider other means of non-punitive approaches to discipline children.
I would definitely say 'No to spanking' |
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